As much as I hate the saying, I’m going to use it.
I am having trouble pulling the trigger on the final steps of starting my business. I need to buy my insurance and I need to start writing proposal letters. The insurance I can sort of justify. I need to use a credit/debit card and I won’t have that from my bank for a week or two.
The other part, the letters, I’m just scared to do. I don’t know what to write or what to ask. What if they say no? What if this doesn’t pan out? Do I call them first, do I email, do I just send the damn letters?
There are other things I worry about. Once this gets off the ground my husband wants me to hire his sister. Who I don’t trust because she stole from me. He pushes and pushes some days. I actually had to tell him to back off because it felt like he was bullying me into it. I have other people I want to hire. People I trust and who need a job to help get by.
The other day I said I was doing this because I wanted to make more money, to pay off bills, and buy a bigger home.
However, there are bigger parts to the dream. The parts that’s are hard to put out there because I worry someone will laugh. I want a bigger home so we can have more children. Also because I want to foster and adopt.
I want my business to be able to grow and provide jobs to women in shelters or group homes. I want to eventually move from the flee market to a store front, that preferably has apartments above so I can give my employees affordable housing.
I need to push past the fear.